Welcome to the People's Republic of Hyperbole

Please check your brain at the door. Other than the sound of my jaw hitting the floor, I offer the following without comment:

SYDNEY, Australia—An obesity pandemic threatens to overwhelm health systems around the globe with illnesses such as diabetes and heart disease, experts at an international conference warned yesterday. "This insidious, creeping pandemic of obesity is now engulfing the entire world," Paul Zimmet, chairman of the meeting of more than 2,500 experts and health officials, said in a speech opening the week-long International Congress on Obesity. "It's as big a threat as global warming and bird flu."

[ audience roars ]

"Thank you. Thank you so much. You're too kind. So, a monk, a rabbi, and an obesity expert walk into this bar ... "

The full article can be found here.